


How to Cope With(out) the End of the World by Dean Winchester

by Leydhawk



Series: What Freedom Looks Like [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol Abuse, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Needs a Hug, Depression, Destiel - Freeform, Fix-It, Grief, Happy Ending, M/M, Mexican dub is canon, YO A TI CAS, and caused the Empty to come take Cas, cw can suck it, it is Cas not Cass and that’s that, splits from canon partway through 15x19, was spoken aloud
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:54:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27798046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leydhawk/pseuds/Leydhawk
Summary: In this Verse, my imagination split off from the moment the fam drove away from Chuck. This initial part of my series is Dean’s first week after that.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: What Freedom Looks Like [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2033791
Comments: 9
Kudos: 38





	How to Cope With(out) the End of the World by Dean Winchester

**Author's Note:**

> Big thank you to flying piglet, my beta reader, and bundibird for emotional support through this crazy post finale time. 
> 
> I’m not interested in concrit or negativity. DLDR y’all.

Dean drove away from the beach, leaving Chuck behind. Chuck was no longer god. He was just a man. 

And Dean had spared him. He’d looked at Chuck on the ground, seeming to revel in the opportunity to die at his hands, or at Sam’s. But Dean’s spirit had lifted and he’d heard Cas’ declaration that everything Dean did, he always did from love. 

They’d left Chuck there, groveling. 

Okay, so maybe love and spite. 

Dean swung out onto the paved street beyond the entrance to the wilderness area and startled hard at the sound of a car horn. He jerked the wheel and avoided the collision, then looked over his shoulder at Jack. 

“What the hell?”

Jack smiled slightly. He still had that eerie glow, almost like a barely visible heat shimmer surrounding him, and the light glinted of gold in a spark from his eyes. 

“Everyone Chuck disappeared is back.”

The kid said it so matter of factly that Dean almost did a double take. 

“Just like that?” Dean asked. 

“Yes. This world and all the others.”

Sam looked back at Jack, too, his breath catching. 

“All the worlds? It took him months to destroy them!”

Jack only continued to smile and the brothers exchanged a look as they turned back around. Sam pulled his phone out and started texting. 

As Dean drove, he wanted to ask about Cas, but every time he almost opened his mouth, doubt swirled around him whispering ’what ifs’. 

He didn’t ask, he just drove them home. 

Eileen met them at the bunker and Sam disappeared with her. 

Jack went into his room and shut the door. 

Dean headed straight to the liquor and decided to see just how long he could stay blackout drunk. 

Quite some time, it turned out. 

Sam made him eat, and drink something other than booze every now and then, and once threw him in the shower and hosed him off, but time passed. 

Eventually, Dean began to surface with only the deep, lingering aches and brain fog of an extreme bender. 

He woke in his room. The air was stale and smelled bad. 

Nope,  _he_ smelled bad. 

Moving like a ninety year old, he shuffled painfully to the shower. 

He didn’t  feel better after but he did smell better. 

Out to the kitchen. 

Coffee. Toast. Swilled and stoically chewed and swallowed standing over the sink. A handful of painkillers and an entire bottle of water. More coffee. 

Dean turned around and leaned against the counter, staring into the middle distance. 

He was free. They all were. No more dancing on strings for the entertainment of a capricious god. 

What did it even mean, though, when he didn’t know what he wanted?

His eyes shifted over to the liquor cabinet and away, and he pushed off the counter and went to the war room. The only thing on any of the tables was a note from Sam. 

**Taking care of some stuff. Back in a couple days.**

Listening intently, Dean couldn’t hear any indication that anyone else was home. So, no Jack either. 

He went back to his room and when he opened the door he was struck by the funky smell of sweat and booze. He left the door open and stripped his bed and gathered the various clothes strewn about. He deliberately ignored the trench coat that rested on the back of a chair and went to wash all the stinking laundry. 

He remade his bed with fresh sheets and took his laptop with him when he went out to sit at one of their big wooden tables. Looking at the date he saw he’d managed to maintain his whiskey induced mental break for over a week. 

He started searching for a case. 

Several hours later, Dean heard the door above open. 

“—wants to see you,” Jack’s voice drifted down. Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. As much as he longed to return to the oblivion he’d floated in, they had work to do, not the least of which was figuring out how dangerous Jack might now be with all the power of Chuck and Amara in him. 

Footsteps on the stairs and Dean’s eyes popped open as every hair on his body stood up. He shoved back from the table so hard the chair toppled behind him and he stared up at the group of people coming down into the bunker. 

Sam, Eileen, Jack... 

“ _Cas_ ?!”

Dean’s body locked up. 

Sam, Eileen, and Jack came down to the floor but Dean couldn’t tear his eyes away from the figure that had stopped halfway down the last section of stairs. 

Everything froze. No one moved for several long heartbeats that Dean could hear and feel pulsing through his body amidst a roaring in his ears. 

Then Cas took the last few steps down and suddenly Dean could move. 

Some kind of wounded animal noise ripped from him and in four rushing strides he was in front of Castiel and had his arms around him and was squeezing hard. 

Cas seemed to hesitate for a long moment and Dean desperately gathered him closer, burying his face against Cas’ neck, and he finally felt Cas’ hands on his back, hesitantly, then stronger until Dean felt Cas crushing Dean against himself as well. There was no space between them, knees to faces, it was an unequivocally romantic hug; a lover’s embrace. 

Questions raced through Dean’s mind about how-how- _how_ , but really, none of it mattered. All that mattered was Cas was safe and alive and in Dean’s arms like Dean had only ever dreamed he could be. A sob wrenched itself from Dean’s chest and he squinched his eyes closed more so he wouldn’t cry, and they both just held tighter. 

**Author's Note:**

> My next installment has Eileen Leahy and I am actively looking for a sensitivity reader who is deaf or HoH or knows the community very well. Help?


End file.
